Meaningless

There is this point of your life you have no idea what you are doing.

You’re basically lost and you refuse to understand and learn more about why and how are you lost.

You decided to go with the flow, for your career, your future, your relationship, your weekends and basically everything else.

Things that had happened probably left a huge impact in your life, and you’re no longer in pain.

Just like the song Six Degree of Separations by The Script, you mourned and you accepted then you move on.

Whoever knows about the incident praise you for being so tough, and they told you that you’ve always been the strongest to handle all the unfortunate events you’ve been in.

You know how to work yourself up and you get better each time after the fallen times.

People don’t get it. You did it because you’re such an arrogant living human who’s constantly pissed at herself.

No matter what happened, you blame everything to yourself and you wallow through it.

And people just love putting expectations on you, but you can’t blame them as you were naturally forced to be an overachiever.

You’re tired but you somehow got into the point where you have this love hate relationship with the achievements you’re getting.

You work yourself up all the time. However, this time the difference is that you don’t know what you’re doing and why you’re doing- because for the first time in your life you actually don’t care to plan things out.

People pressured you in it. All the adults keep on reminding you for who you are and telling you what to do. Some may even trying to take advantages on you because they know you’re desperate to figure things out.

Others would never understand the same way you do. You’re still afraid of people, but you blend in well- every single time.

You don’t deny yourself as a weirdo, you really don’t.

You’re no longer afraid of being in the dark, being confused and being alone.

And that’s how you know, you’re 23.